I got your Clipper Nation right here Donald!

Lakers bandwagon is riding proud and smooth. My boys are back in the NBA Finals for the 5^th time in this century. It feels so special to completely write the team off in October and now rabidly cheer in amazement as they play into June. And I have not heard a Clipper ad on the radio in weeks and that is a good thing. If LA radio could also lose all of the Male Sexual Performance Ads from drive time that would be a good thing, too.

I defy anyone to say they are members of the Clipper Nation. There is no such nation. Donald Sterling is the Al Davis of the NBA without the shimmering sweat suit and chains. I have thrown stones at the Buss Family in this very blog and I reserve the right to continue to do so. But under Dr. Jerry’s ownership the Lakers have won 8 NBA Titles. Since he acquired the Lakers, only one other owner is in the same zip code: The Chicago Bulls Jerry Reinsdorf with six. The Bulls won all of their six in the 1990’s with Michael Jordan. The Lakers won in the 70’s, the 80’s, the 90’s and this century with different lineups assembled through bold moves and draft picks. The Lakers won, blew it up and rebuilt at least three times during Buss's ownership. The Bulls won and blew it up and it has stayed blown up.

Here is some history. Dr Jerry Buss sold most of his apartment holdings to Attorney Donald Sterling in 1979 to finance the $67 million required to purchase the Lakers, Kings and the Forum from Jack Kent Cooke. In 1981, Jerry Buss recommended to Sterling to use some of his apartment money and buy the moribund San Diego Clippers for $12.5 million. Our Donald followed Dr. J’s advice, bought the franchise, and then moved them to Los Angeles under the cover of darkness. I am sure Jerry Buss was pleased when The Donald followed his sage counsel, thrilled when he moved the Clippers to Los Angeles without league approval and ebullient when he invaded the Los Angeles market and infringed on the Los Angeles Lakers' valuable rights thatBuss had just paid $55 million more than Sterlings to acquire. With the Los Angeles Lakers playing in Inglewood, no one was crying foul except Buss. The City of Los Angeles was thrilled to have a tenant at the dilapidated Sports Arena.

When the Lakers moved to Staples, the Clippers were not far behind them. They flirted with Anaheim but Sterling covets Los Angeles and he got it on the cheap. He has an NBA schedule with the Lakers on that schedule six times a season. The Clippers season seat package is 30% less than a Lakers season seat. The Staples Center was built for the Lakers but the Clippers are right there in Apartment 2B. There are not any Clipper Championship banners or retired jerseys but the seats are the same and the beers are still $12.

The Clippers never contend but they are among the most profitable NBA franchises. The Clippers average 16,000 fans per game. These fans pay on average $40/game. Cha-ching $28 million. The Clippers get the revenue from the NBA TV contract cha-ching $26 million. So $54 million is in the coffers before the first hot dog is sold. The Clippers have the 20^th rated payroll in the league’s 2^nd largest market. It is more profitable to pretend that you want to contend than actually contend. The Clippers have been to the playoffs 4 times in the 25 years that they been in Los Angeles. They have won exactly one series which was against the legendary Denver Nuggets in 2006.

The Clippers are posers. Sterling fires coaches and makes bad personnel decisions. The only time we hear from him are in his constant Man of the Year paid for advertisements in the Los Angeles Times. The Clippers’ ineptitude has lead to several flops with the top draft picks including Michael Olowokandi with the #1 pick in 1998. I think Michael has three Subway Sandwich franchises and he is forever grateful to the Clippers for seeing in him what absolutely no other NBA team saw in him. They drafted Lamar Odom in 1999 and he was gone after the first contract. He is also very grateful at this moment that the Clippers did not re-sign him.

The Clippers have stumbled along into 18 lottery picks in the 23 years of the draft lottery. In contrast, the Lakers have never lost their way to the top pick in the draft. The Clippers have never traded for a lottery pick, they earned them fair and square. The Lakers traded fan favorite Gail Goodrich for the top draft pick that became Magic Johnson in 1979. The Lakers traded Don Ford for the pick that became James Worthy in 1982. The Lakers have had two lottery picks, Eddie Jones in 1994 and Andrew Bynum in 2005. Then, during the Lakers Dark ages this century, Jerry and Mitch waited patiently while Sterling courted Kobe in 2004 like a working girl on 14th and Grand. Buss and Kupchak were quiet and Kobe eventually stayed in the fold. I would have not been so circumspect under similar circumstances. I can only hope for an occasion to enjoy similar circumstances to test my circumspection.

I have not been huge fan of DJ Buss’s antics but he has delivered a quality sports experience to Los Angeles for nearly 30 years. The Dodgers owned LA until 1979 and then still were the fan favorite through 1999. That all changed when Kobe and Shaq won their first championship. Frank McCourt, you might take note before you buy your next $20 million home or add a mall to Chavez Ravine. Attendance and success are not the same thing. The Lakers have passed the Dodgers in performance and relevance. Jerry gets the difference between real estate and sports. I am wondering when The McCourt’s might have a similar revelation?

The Lakers are off to the NBA Finals and Donald, Elgin and the Clippers are back in the lottery where they have been more times than almost any other team. Despite all of the Clippers high draft picks, exceptional revenue streams, and enhanced valuation from the original investment, Sterling still manages the team like one of his apartments in Santa Monica. A little cosmetic work every other year, change out the manager every 3-4 years, and scrutinize your tenants when their demands get unreasonable relative to their value on your balance sheet. You will never win a championship or even contend, but when you share the city with the best franchise in the NBA, why would DS care, he will never lose money. For Sterling it is not about championship banners, it is all about the Benjamins.

BTW: Is it just me, or does it just feel like the next thing we are going to see on a Friday night is a slow speed car chase in a white bronco involving Roger Clemens? Al Cowlings is out of town and I counseled Andy Petitte to steer clear. It has been quiet but the feces are coagulating near the fan. Roger is probably going to have to play the “race” card to get out of this mess. He will soon be in Florida playing municipal golf courses with the Juice.

“A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.” Larry the Cable Guy