LA Confidential

The conclusion to the USC-UCLA was foregone weeks ago when USC got pummeled by Stanford 55-21. Preternatural Peter has never appeared more perplexed as he did in the aftermath of that record loss at home. Pete’s Trojans lost at home in front of their maddening masses worse than any USC coach has ever lost in school history. With two weeks to prepare and disappointment cursing their veins, Pete had Troy ready on Saturday night for their cross town rivals.

In the weeks preceding the game, omnipresent Pete zigzagged through the carnage. He struggled to explain why the Trojans were going to be playing a bowl game in December for the first time in seven years. Carroll seemed confused and at a loss to explain the recent chain of events. It had never happened since his first season. In 2007, between championships, he could dismiss the aberration of one point loss to a 41 point underdog Stanford team on the last play of the game. The Trojans still went to the Rose Bowl. Explaining a 34 point beat down to that same ten point underdog this season is far more vexing and the second mea culpa after the Oregon pasting two weeks earlier.

Two weeks ago, Peter was staring down Stanford coach Jim Harbaugh when he went for a two point conversion leading 48-21 with seven minutes to go. Stanford had ruined USC’s title hopes in 2007. Pete made them pay last year in Palo Alto with a 27-0 rout while he left his NFL starter laden line up playing late in the game. Payback is never timely or fair. In this season’s upset, Pete Carroll and Harbaugh shared much dissected comments at midfield after this year’s game. Pete looked about as happy as he was at the Mark Sanchez press conference earlier this year.

With the Stanford and Oregon blowouts of both teams, the magnitude and importance of this game was underscored by the 7:00 PM telecast on local cable channel Prime Ticket in standard definition. Fortunately, this game did not require high def. It was an ugly, meaningless game that the only Yard copy occurred in the last minute. UCLA has never won a USC game when the game’s first touchdown is a Trojan interception return for that touchdown. USC linebacker Malcolm Smith ended UCLA’s night with that first half pick and the only score of the first half. Twenty-nine minutes and six seconds of the second half were a screen saver.

Then Peter the Bitter went for seven with a 21-7 lead and 54 seconds left. UCLA coach Rick Nuehiesel had called time out to stop the clock. It is our understanding that once time expires if one team has 21 and the other has seven, you lose that game. The only hope is to slow the clock with the hope for a miracle. Miracles sound like some of our parlays this weekend at the Hilton sports book but however remote, it is the only hope to win the game besides capitulation. Capitulation might have been polite protocol for Pete and his brightly festooned fans. It might have ended the game ten minutes earlier.

In response to the timeout, angry Carroll called a play action pass when no one in the stands or any other coach in America would have called that play at any time and never in a rivalry game. Postgame, Peter the classless disingenuously suggested that “he did not call that play” but when he heard the call on his head set, his competitive spirit took over and the Trojans executed the play perfectly. Pete, WTF?

With eleven UCLA players in the box attempting to stop the run and force a fumble, Damian Williams on a post pattern was a play in the play book that should not have been called. Pete cheered at the outcome like he had not in a month. The Yard does not completely understand the petulance of Rick the young in delaying the inevitable but it was not an effort to run up the score. We are not sure when Pete decided he needed to be that guy to bitch slap him in his hood. It was like the bar scene from Good Fellas. Pete was Joe Pesci.

Pete might leave USC and take many of the open jobs before he needs to face UCLA at the Rose Bowl next year. He has owned this town for seven years but losing three ugly Pac-10 games this year has not gone unnoticed. Pete is never going to pass up the San Diego deal again. He understands that myopic loyalty is earned a year at a time.

USC QB Matt Barkley does not have the same options. He was beaming after throwing his only never should have been thrown TD pass of the game. He purred telling Prime Ticket how he made the correct read that lead to his last second gift in a marginal season. He apparently needed that 12th touchdown to move ahead of his eleven interceptions. His parents must be proud.

OT: Toby Gerhard will win the Heisman trophy. He is the epitome of what a Heisman winner should be. He is from Norco High School. He leads the nation in rushing, is taking 21 hours in course credit in his senior year at Stanford and starts in centerfield on the baseball team. He is a humble, low gloss work horse who is exciting to watch.