The Power of Pixie Dust

After months of ruminations and allegations, the ginger Fuhrer finally got indicted. It was unexpectedly unexpected. The Teflon former world leader had erased more scandals than Olivia Pope. The Manhattan DA and Trump have been publicly sparring on unsocial media. Trump threatened to mobilize his whack pack. In the end, Trump feigned confidence and agreed to fly back to NY on Trump One and get booked into the system.  The shame for the fallen leader to have mug shots, fingerprints and a jumpsuit must be ravaging for his hair. For her part, Stormy D is ready to appear in court and local clubs in the area in and around the trial. It is hard to believe Trump would subject himself to the humiliation.  Does anyone know where AC Cowlings and the White Bronco are tomorrow afternoon?

 

The Yard’s fervor for college basketball has been well documented in this blog and during private therapy sessions.  We will stick with the blog to not further sully the tarnish. This year’s tournament delivered on every level.  There was a depth to the madness that has never been reached.  The Final Four was a mashup of first timers and one blueblood.  The Mountain West conference had never had a team in the elite eight let alone the Final Four.  The Aztecs of San Diego blew right through the mid-major glass ceiling into the championship game.  The Hurricanes of Miami were a nice story. Head coach Jim Larranga has built a sustainable threat in south beach.  The FAU Owls were the darlings of the dance and Boca Raton.  They went all David on the Goliath’s of Tennessee and Kansas State, landing in the Final Four as a nine seed. The Owls were 7.2 seconds away from that final until the Aztec snatched the dream and made it their own.  UCONN is the 800-pound silver back decimating opponents in their mist.

 

There have only been three other Final Fours before this year that did not include at least one number one seed.  None of the top seeds made it out of the third round under a barrage of delusional outcomes.  When all the talk was that only one time in NCAA history has a 16 seed beat a number one, Purdue got overwhelmed by a seemingly overmatched FDU. Top seeds were crashing brackets like it was the southern border.  Game after game unfolded in mystery, exposed its promise, and deposited a result on the court.  It was entertaining for the casual fan but withering for the nearsightedness of the Yard.  It is truly a great event reported locally and nationally after each narrative unfolded.

 

The Yard has been show running the Aztecs of SDSU for years. The gentlemanly excellence of Steve Fisher laid the groundwork for this team’s miracle run.  San Diego State has been the best basketball program in the state of CA the past years.  Consistently better than USC and most times UCLA.  They are the cream of the Mountain West and will be a top team in the Pac-12 in the coming years.  Go Aztecs!

 

Women’s basketball is having a moment.  This Women’s NCAA tournament was their best in history.  It is not an anomaly for this season but the reality of how far they have come.  The women’s game is more closely aligned with what Dr. Naismith intended with the peach baskets at the YMCA in Springfield. Now, they sparkled in their own madness, and we are not just talking about LSU coach Kim Mulkey. The female final four has been exhilarating.  The exploits of Iowa’s Caitlan Clark have been reported culminating with her player of the year victory.  She wished it culminated with a win over LSU, but she came up short on most everything but her three pointers.  She was heaving shots from Steph Curry land, but the pixie dust was all used up. 

 

It seems the pixie dust got trapped in the swirling vortex of LSU coach Kim Mulkey. Mulkey was the first to win a championship as a player at LA Tech, an assistant coach, and head coach.  She won an Olympic gold medal as a player, and this was her fourth NCAA title as a coach. She won three while coaching Baylor for 31 years.  She is a Louisiana girl to her core, and she wanted to go home and help the Bayou state.  She left a successful program in Waco to take over a 9-13 program in Baton Rouge.  She immediately made the Tigers a contender in year one and champions in year two.  She is one bad ass grandmother coaching on the sidelines in a pink boa.  All hail LSU!

The Sweetest Thing

It is no secret the NCAA Men’s basketball tournament is the penultimate event of our corporate calendar.  Work comes to almost a complete halt during the three weeks of March madness.  The bar is not set that high, but the diversion is intense.  UCLA’s third straight trip to the Sweet 16 is well sweet.  It has been a long time since the Bruins have enjoyed regular tournament triumphs. Wiki must go all the way to the pedestrian Ben Howland era to find that success.  Nick Cronin seems to be building a more sustainable program where McDonald’s come to play. They are flying alone as the rest of the Pac-12 did not make it to the dance or left early.

 

The Yard hosts a pool which has provided thrills and spills for everyone involved over the years.  The Yard’s best finish in 20+ years is 2^nd.  It is difficult to win the pool even with the Yard’s advanced analytics team.  In 2018, we were off to our greatest opening round in our nascent history.  The mighty Cavaliers of Virginia were the number one overall seed.  They were playing the #64 overall seed in the opening round.  The Tony Bennett coached Cavs were prohibitive favorites. The Yard and every other participant in the US knew that no 16 seed had ever won an opening round game.  Virginia went down 74-54 and torpedoed our bracket.  Purdue joined this two-university club last Friday night with less impact.

 

Until this weekend, there has never been an NCAA Men’s basketball tournament game played in Las Vegas.  The NCAA can be a bit judgy and it was judged Las Vegas is not up to the high ethical standards with which the NCAA holds itself.  Those are some murky waters shrouded in the billions generated from television and merch.  They do have a really nice campus in Indy that costs a fortune.  It is the NCAA sanctuary of hypocrisy. Finally, the clouds broke, and our sports and gambling Mecca was awarded this very Sweet 16 matchup. This first time Sin City Sweetness has our Bruins facing off against Gonzaga again.  These two universities have staged some classic battles. In 2006 at San Jose, UCLA trailed the Adam Morrison led Zags for the entire game.  The deficit was as many as 17.  The Yard was cursing the television and small children within earshot.  Then with three minutes left, and Morrison halfway through his collegiate victory lap to the final four, UCLA went all carpe diem.  Gonzaga suddenly sagged and the Bruins pounced on their insecurities like a prom night diva. When Luc Richard Mah a Boute scored underneath with ten seconds left, the Bruins had their only lead of the game at just the right time. UCLA celebrated with Adam of the scraggle crumpled and crying at halfcourt. In 2020, heavily favored Gonzaga clashed with the upstart Bruins all the way to the final seconds of overtime, nailing a half court winner.  The Bruins are limping into tonight’s contest.  We are still working the phones for a press pass.

 

Baseball season is coming on the heels of the tournament.  The Dodgers home opener for 2023 is a night game on Thursday March 30. Huh? March Madness will be in its final throes of psychosis and Dodger baseball will be on the air. It is like when Jupiter and Mercury go into retrograde.  The synapses will be firing in all four cerebral quadrants.  It will be a different year for the Blue crew.  Justin Turner, Cory, Cody, and Trea are all gone.  Gavin Lux was the heir to the infield before his season ended.  The WBC was exciting this year with so many MLB stars playing. Mookie and Mike Trout helped the US get to the championship game against Japan.  Ohtani like Mookie and Trout. Ohtani striking out his teammate Trout to win the whole thing was historic and he did not get hurt doing it.  The Mets Edwin Diaz was not so lucky during Puerto Rico’s semifinal victory.  He celebrated getting that last out and tore something and he is out until 2024.  Lucky for Diaz he just signed a five-year $107 million guaranteed deal with a $12 million signing bonus.  We could not be happier with Diaz’s good fortune with his new deal.  We are more elated that Mets owner Steve Cohen took another major blow to his 2023 hopes for a NY title.  He has already mocked the MLB salary cap and now $20 million got flushed.  We do not like Cohen and his ill-gotten billions very much.

 

The Lake Show is still playing basketball in the NBA.  They have been playing surprisingly well of late even with Lebron out and Davis playing part-time.  The prodigal son D’Angelo Russell returned to Babylon. He seems to have matured during his sojourn. Swaggy P and Izzy Azalea are no longer a thing, and the locker room is not as toxic as his rookie season.  The Lakers have done many machinations since Kobe retired.  They tanked and got lottery picks for the first time in a long time. First round draft picks Julius Randle, Russell, Brandon Ingram, and Kyle Kuzma were all traded away and would be a great young nucleus, but it was not to be.  They are all thriving elsewhere while Laker fans are left writhing.

 

Lebron brought another title in that truncated season but little else. He passed Laker Legend Kareem Abdul Jabbar to become the all-time scoring leader.  It was a monumental achievement during a mediocre season.  Jabbar and James have a frosty relationship that was on full display in the awkward mid-game recognition.  Kareem had to finish college while Lebron went straight from HS to 27.6 points per game at age 18. No one will ever catch James for a scoring record. It will last forever because no one will ever play that long at that high level as James has.  He is the GOAT. 

 

Fun fact: When Kareem broke Wilt’s record, it was against the Utah Jazz.  The fun part is the game was played in Las Vegas at the Thomas and Mack.  The NBA was struggling a bit with the Mormons, so they spiced up the season with a few home games in Las Vegas. Everyone except the NCAA got that remedy.

Pivot to Madness

On the one-year anniversary of their brute invasion, Russian leader Vladimir Putin declared that China and Russia are deepening their ties.  It was kind of a “Xi Jinping got my back” moment for Vlade.  He went on further to say their strengthening relationship will bring stability to the world. We have seen the world become increasingly unstable since Russia invaded Ukraine.  We do think the world would stabilize some if Vlade withdrew.  Russia and China have always been wary allies.  There is not an ideological bond except for the ruler for life bromance.  They are like the Gambino and Genovese families brokering a truce.  It works well for a while and then someone ends up with two slugs in the head at Humberto’s Clam House.  China and Russia blast the West. The US is China’s largest trading partner. China needs work for their 112 million factory workers. Average annual income in the US is $97K; Average annual income for a Russian household is $16K. Do the math.

 

Florida is a bastion of conservative values and politics.  Governor Ron DeSantis has a blunt force trauma personality.  He is pro-life, anti-Critical Race Theory and finished with the woke.  He will be throwing his cap into the ring as an electable version of Trump.  He and Trump despise each other, and the first debate will be a classic if Trump survives that long. The Yard was shocked to find that Florida is passing a law that dogs can no longer hang their heads out the window of a moving vehicle.  We reached out to all our reliable sources, and it is true, no more dog heads flapping in the wind out the car window. Ruh-Ro! It is a canine catastrophe. A shocking development for all Florida pooches.  The Dog Lobby is already barking it up the tree.  Rescue dogs are demanding to be relocated to states that allow them to put their heads out the window freely.  Cats have been clowning dogs for decades for their window antics.  They are pleased with this development as part of their world domination plans. It should be a hot topic come election season.

 

Since the inception of the Yard in 2007, our publishers have posted 185 missives on the internet.  There are countless others that are spoiled by procrastinating them into irrelevance. Many never made it from the bowels of the laptop to the HTTP.  The Yard has written more blogs about college basketball than any other.  UCLA did it to us with those miraculous teams of the late 60’s and 70’s. John R. Wooden was our Yoda.  We have travelled to a galaxy far, far away since those halcyon days. UCLA is back in the national discussion under the stellar coaching of Nick Cronin.  Cronin has brought Cincinnati toughness and discipline to the Bruins much the way Wooden brought Indiana discipline to the U in 1947.  Nick has a long way to go to be in the conversation of great UCLA hoops coaches, but we like his style.  The tournament is wide open this year.  Duke and North Carolina are finding their way after their legends retired. UCONN is back in the national mix for the first time in a long time.  Houston could be the real deal or poseurs.  Alabama basketball is playing better than the football team and that does not happen often.

 

In these turbulent times when the news always seems disturbing, the Yard suggests that you pivot your attention to the NCAA basketball tournament.  The tournament begins in earnest on March 16 at 9:15 AM Pacific.  There will be sixteen basketball games that day and another 16 on Saint Paddy’s day.  The games will be coast to coast and every hamlet in between.  Big schools like Purdue, UCONN and UCLA should be dancing that weekend.  There will be Bonnies, Screaming Eagles and maybe a Great Dane also.  There will be a Cinderella team this year, maybe to the finals. There will be upsets in the first round.  Brackets will be blown by the end of the first day.  There will be a last second game winner and critical missed free throws.  We can only hope the Bruins are on the positive side of those events on their march to Houston.  Even for the casual basketball fan the local energy and enthusiasm for these 68 schools is inspiring. Some of the blue bloods are bloated with NIL laden student athletes. The rest are there for the love of the game and their degree.  They will be taking their game to another level because they won’t be playing at the next level.  For three weeks in March, heroes are born through the legends they create. Join a pool and get some skin in the game. Every game will be televised.  Work and Vlade will still be there in April.